At least once a day during my daily TikTok scroll, I come across a piece of sexual wellness advice. Most recently it was a TikTok user demonstrating how to properly finger a person with a vulva. Other days I’ve learned how to safely choke your partner without crushing their windpipe, bookmarked some blowjob tips and even consumed some illuminating content from certified sex therapists. Point is, TikTok is an unexpected hub for sex tips and tricks.
However, the popular video-sharing app is also riddled with misinformation and users who promote dangerous practices, like inhaling tanning nasal sprays, without much fact-checking. So when a recent “sex hack” went bonkers on the app, we had to Snopes that bitch.
The hack in question claims to hold the secret to hitting the elusive G-spot, and it’s a surprisingly straightforward technique: Simply press down on the lower stomach/bladder of someone with a vulva during penetration and voila! An earth-shattering orgasm will appear.
Search “pressing down on her stomach” on TikTok and you’ll be greeted with an endless string of videos from users all cheekily touting this sex tip, however, they don’t offer much explanation into why pressing down on your partner’s stomach might induce an orgasm.
It’s why we spoke with Casey Tanner, an AASECT-certified sex therapist and sexpert for LELO, the leading designer of premium sex toys, who is also the owner of sex therapy practice The Expansive Group and creator of Queer Sex Therapy, a platform on Instagram and TikTok that offers sex education, and… surprise! She says it actually works.
“What we colloquially refer to as the G-spot, is actually just the internal part of the clitoris. So, whether you’re stimulating someone with a vulva externally on the clitoris, or internally on the G-spot, either way, you’re getting up the clitoris,” explains Tanner. So when you apply pressure on the lower abdomen of someone with a vulva, you’re essentially putting pressure onto the body of the clitoris.
“Because the clitoris isn’t just that tiny head outside of the body, it’s really a larger wishbone-shaped sexual organ. Now, when you’re also having penetrative sex, while simultaneously pressing on the abdomen, you’re creating what’s almost like a clitoris sandwich,” she continues.
Whether penetration is occurring with a penis, toy or finger, it’s putting pressure on the clitoris from the frontal wall of the vagina while you’re putting pressure externally through pressing down on the lower abdomen. When you put pressure on the clitoris from both directions, you increase sensitivity which can help people move towards orgasm faster.
“It can feel really pleasurable. So it is not a myth, it actually can increase pressure on the clitoris, and for most people with vulvas, it’s the clitoris that leads to orgasm,” says Tanner.
While TikTok has certainly brought this G-spot maneuver to the mainstream, Tanner mentions she’s had knowledge of the technique since the beginning of her sex therapy training 4-5 years ago, and notes, it’s likely been around within some niche communities for decades. However, for the rest of us, we can attribute our lack of knowledge of this ostensibly salient piece of info to our no good, very bad sex education system.
Review: After Two Years, Maude’s “Spot” Vibrator Is Still Our Favorite
Meet the DTC sexual wellness brand’s first-ever internal vibrator“Some of us got no sex education, and those of us who did got what I call fear-based sex education, which is just talking about the things that can go wrong during sex, and no one really told us about all those things that could go right, or how to advocate for our pleasure,” says Tanner, who adds that she’s not surprised people are using social media, specifically TikTok, to share knowledge that promotes pleasure since these conversations aren’t happening in more formal settings.
“I actually experienced it on a personal level long before I ever read about it,” she adds. “So I think this is coming far more out of peoples’ lived experiences than it is coming out of their research.”
However, you should, as always, be mindful that not all the information circling the web (and TikTok in particular) is accurate, especially since the majority of users on TikTok who are encouraging viewers to engage in specific sex acts or try certain products, aren’t citing their sources or are just basing their endorsement on secondhand anecdotal evidence.
“I would say proceed with caution, but do proceed, do explore, do try things. But fact check, do some Googling, get some verification before you jump into trying something that you’re only hearing about on TikTok,” encourages Tanner.
So if you’re someone who has sex with people with vulvas and would like to blow their minds with this TikTok- and certified sex therapist-approved technique, here are a few things to note before you go pressing on stomachs all willy nilly:
Apply gentle pressure on the mons pubis
You want to press down right above the area where your partner’s pubic hairline ends, aka the mons pubis, with a fairly small amount of pressure explains Tanner, but be sure you’re using your whole hand.
“You wouldn’t want to press with one finger, you’d want to either use the palm of your hand or a couple of fingers. So, not a small concentrated amount of pressure, but a larger, more gentle pressure,” she says.
Talk to your partner before you go press on their stomach
This technique might not be suitable for people with vaginal pain or tightness, abdominal sensitivity or even a sensitive bladder, and could actually increase discomfort instead, notes Tanner.
“If you’re pressing on a sensitive bladder, it can cause urination, and so, if you’re not sure about whether your partner experiences any of that, that’s definitely something you’re going to want to consider,” she says, adding that as a general rule of thumb, any time when you introduce something new into sex, it’s better to introduce it in a non-sexual conversation than it is to do so mid-sex.
“It can feel really vulnerable to have somebody approach something new when you’re in the middle of sex, the pressure to say yes can be higher, so always safer to ask in a non-sexual context,” adds Tanner. “When you do try it, check-in as you go, don’t just put all your weight onto it. Actually, never put all your weight onto it. Start by pressing really softly, really gently, checking in, ‘How does this feel for you? Does it feel good?’ Just because it feels good for some people, doesn’t mean it feels good for everybody, and there’s nothing wrong with you if this doesn’t feel good for you.”
…especially since the stomach can be an area of insecurity for some
“Women are socialized to have some vulnerability around our midsections and our stomachs, and many of us were taught to direct attention away from our stomachs during sex. So, just be mindful that introducing this attention onto the belly can bring up some emotional vulnerability,” says Tanner.
Basically, don’t do it spontaneously in order to impress somebody.
How to make it even better
Yes, you can even upgrade this specific technique, according to Tanner. While you’re pressing down on the lower abdomen, you can also press down and slightly up, which pulls the skin upwards a bit and towards the chest.
“What that can do is actually expose the external head of the clitoris so that if you’re touching the clitoris externally, it actually can become even more sensitive that way,” she explains.
There are also, of course, a number of ways to stimulate the G-spot that don’t involve this specific technique or a penis — specifically with toys that are curved inwards, which apply the same level of pressure on the frontal wall.
More Like This
Whether you’re looking to get into shape, or just get out of a funk, The Charge has got you covered. Sign up for our new wellness newsletter today.
